Mindfulness.

A word that I just know in January 2018 and become a key of my life since then.

It was in the beginning of 2018, and my mind was screwed up. I broke up with my boyfriend but I have to prepare myself for the upcoming examinations USBN (National School Examination) and SBMPTN (National University Admission Test) at the same time. Bullying at school and friendship conflict made my life completely screwed. I could not help but feeling anxious also physically and mentally tired. I felt unhappy with my life and I could not focus while working anything, especially after that broke up. I felt so desperate. He was my support system while I was bullied (I could not tell my bullying story to my family).

I felt so desperate then I was looking for a way to get back together with my boyfriend, then I found Law of Attraction meditation. I found a lot of Law of Attraction meditation on Youtube. Somebody even guaranteed that this meditation could attract someone that we want only in three months. I was keen into it then I tried it. After three months trying this meditation, I still could not get back together with him. Instead I got more valuable things which were mindfulness and happiness.

After those three months, I learned a lot from the meditation. One of the points is happiness comes from within yourself, not from others. It may sound cliche but it is just the reality. Happiness is created when we start to love and accept ourselves. Mindfulness is created when we aware about ourselves and our surroundings, when we become mindful about everything that exists.

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When I am doing the meditation, there were some points that I would like to highlight:

‍1. Find the most comfortable position.
‍Meditation can be done with many positions, not only sitting with cross-legged but it also can be done by lying down. Put your both hands on your chest and focus in those areas, imagine that there is a source of life energy which exists there.

‍2. Close your eyes, it will be much easier to focus if you close your eyes.

3. Count your breath slowly until your body becoming really relax. Be aware of your breath.

4. After that you can do self-affirmation or visualization.
‍On my first time doing meditation, I use self-affirmation a lot because I am not confident as a result of bullying. I start my self-affirmation by saying my name out loud so I become aware of myself. After that I will say words that show my strength, my good traits, and all the positive things that I have. This aim to remind ourselves that we have a lot of positive sides to be grateful of, instead of focusing on our negative traits. Then we continue by saying all the things that we want to get from this life but we saying it in present tense without saying words like “wish” or “hope”.

Example: “I am Tika (say your name here). I am friendly, diligent, and I care a lot about animals. I am a good listener, etc (mention your self affirmation). I am happy with my life. I am loved. My friends and family support me (mentioning all the things that we wish it will happen in the future with a confidence that it will really happen).”

Self-affirmation can be done by saying it out loud or whispering.
Besides self-affirmation, I also do a visualization. I visualize a specific event. Visualization is different with imagination. Visualization is done by imagining an event specifically and detail. Visualize the detail such as the place, whom you are with, smells, and a touch.
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‍5. Meditation is ended by counting back your breath and open your eyes slowly.

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If you are a busy person, you do not have to worry because meditation should not have to be done by sitting with cross-legged and saying self-affirmation out loud. The keys of mindfulness are “be aware” and “be present”. Meditation can be done with simple way by counting breath and steps, observe the environment, which can you do even when you are eating. When you are walking, you can count your steps like “one, two, one, two” or “right, left, eight, left”. Breath meditation is also done like that. While breathing, you may count “one, two, three, four” or “inhale….exhale….”.

When you are eating, you may do a meditation by observing and describing. Pay detailed attention to your food then ask yourself about the shape, colour, texture, and smells. Chew it slowly and describe the flavor, texture, even your feeling when you eat the food. Meditation can be done in every situation with a simple way such as observing and describing something in your mind. That way, you can be more aware about your surroundings, yourself, and your life. By being aware, we can live our life more relaxed, not rushing out, and busy with everything that comes to our minds.

After three months practicing meditation, I feel a lot better. I can appreciate and love myself. I can be confident even though I am bullied. I am still happy even though my boyfriend left me. I can be relaxed and not stressed when I have to face USBN (National School Examination) or SBMPTN (National University Admission Test). Practicing meditation is really food and change my whole life therefore I decide to do it every day and every time. Meditation teaches me to appreciation every food that I eat, be grateful about every breath I take, and the most important thing is meditation teaches me on how to be happy and enjoy my life even though there are always problems on the way.

Learn more about mindfulness at Seribu Tujuan